Askel and Sage

[wolf]

Name: Sage
Alias/Nicknames: none
Gender: Female
Race: Dire wolf
Age: 2 years
Height: 3'4''
Weight:298
Pack/Group: unknown yet
Rank:unranked

Mate:none
Spawn: " "
Siblings: " "
Dame: " "
Sire:" "

Voice Type:smooth elegant

Personality Type:it differs alot

Personality: At first when you just meet her you'll be able to tell she's tempermental and she dosen't show respect unless she has a reason to. When you get to know her she can warm up to you. She will often be cold to strangers, but if they show her respect she'll give it back to them. But if you ever get her mad she will hold grudges adn won't talk to you for a period of time, tha average is around three weeks. She always gives someone a chan ro redeem her talking to them and showing them respect, btu she will olny say she's sorry if she knows she did something wrong.


Appearance: black for the main part of her body and thin red striped along her head tail and legs. She has red pads adn she has red eyes.



History: (I'm just takeing a bit of her past and putting it on hear) As Sage woke up and sniffed slightly she gave a small growl, her brother wasn't hear. She dashed out of the cave and saw a horriable sight, the picture of her brother dead befor her was printed into her mind from that day on.

Name:Askel
Alias/Nicknames: none
Gender: Female
Race: Hellhound
Age: 2 years
Height: 3'4''
Weight:298
Pack/Group: unknown yet
Rank:unranked

Mate: none
Spawn: " "
Siblings: " "
Dame: unknown
Sire:" "

Voice Type:smooth elegant, almost perfect for lureing in prey

Personality Type:quiet

Personality: she's very shy and she never lets herself open up till she knows the person better. She's always the one to be very protective and she won't back down from a challange, no matter what it is. She will get mad fairly easily and she will make sure that no one sees it though, from past experiences with the humans she was torchered by.

Appearance: yellow and red zigzags across her black pelt, and she has elongated claws and fangs.. She also has fish spikes down her back that move around when she turns. But that gives her some pain. Her fangs and claws get in the way often enough, but she manages to get around that alot. As soon as she gets over the fangs, spikes, and the claws, she has to manage her longer legs. They come in handy for jumping, but they're a pain to walk with, so they pretty much make her realy clumsy. As for the rest of her she has yellow eyes (with slits for the puiples) and a yellow underbelly and pawpads. She's always sensitive about that, so when ever she gets a comment on them (good or bad) she always just lookes the other way and ignors it.



History: she was in a lab almost all her life, she dosen't tell

[River]

You'll need to add a lot to both of these profiles. First off, their personalities are waaaay too short. I need at least a paragraph, which is like five sentences. If her personality changes, how does it changes? What does she go from and to? Does she go from being angry to be sad? And what causes these changes? Does she get angry at strangers? At friends? Or does she become happy when she sees somebody she knows? Appearance should be a paragraph as well. What are the stripes like? Are they tiger stripes or just random? Are they skinny stripes or wide stripes? Are they on her head? On her tail? What color are her eyes? Her pawpads?

Your hellhound is in serious serious need of improvement. I cannot accept her until you effectively describe every one of her traits. Like the wolf, she needs at least a paragraph for her personality and should probably have two for her appearance if you don't have a picture. I need to know everything about her traits so I can tell if anything is over the top or not. But I will say one thing, her spikes cannot "move around from time to time". There is no animal on this planet that can simply move their spikes or fins and there's almost no plausible way for an animal to have such a trait so that will need to be changed. She can still have the spikes but you have to mention how they effect her. As said a thousand times in the rules, your hellhound must have strengths AND weaknesses. So, the spikes should effect her negatively as well as positively. So should the claws...

You don't have to really mess with the history since I don't care too much about that but it would be nice if you could include a paragraph's worth of history. You don't have to, but it would be nice. If you have any questions or I'm not clear about something and you need me to elaborate, please don't hesitate to ask.

[wolf]

Sorry... I'll modify it

[River]

Your wolf's appearance is still too short but, since it's just a wolf character and doesn't really need to be descibed in too much detail, I'll let it go.

The hellhound is satisfactory, though I must tell you that she cannot have elongated claws and have them retract. You'll have to choose one or the other. See the deformity database for more info about that. The spikes on her back are still a bit worrisome for me because the weakness they cause is not really much of a weakness. If all she feels is minor pain, that's not going to effect her ability to fight, which is really what we're trying to do. But, I guess it's alright. Fish spikes are flexable though, typically, meaning they don't do much damage as far as attacking goes because they bend instead of stabbing... I hope you're aware of this.

But, okay... I guess they're alright. ^^ It'd be nice if you could get a picture of the hound at some point though. ;3

[wolf]

kksh, but my com won't work with me on temps. I don't know why